Oftentimes we moms ask what we are sacrificing to be moms. The reality is that sacrifices are abundant. We give up time. We give up all or part of work. We even, at times, give up our dignity when we unknowingly leave home with spit up on our sweater or a cheerio on our butt.
I have realized, however, that motherhood also motivates me. As my son grows up, I am reminded that life moves quickly. Watching him is more real, somehow, than seeing the quite obvious changes I see in the mirror. As a toddler, he needed me all the time....to be fed, dressed, and to avoid physical disaster. He turns 7 soon, and he needs me a whole lot less now. He can get his own food, at least snacks. He can get dressed, when we wants to. He can play in the neighborhood without my watchful eye, although I watch him like a hawk. He has play dates now where I end up with unanticipated "free time".
With each developmental milestone, I realize he not only needs me less but also needs me to be me. As he grows older...the dreaded teenage years...it will be my responsibility to have an identity outside of him so that he is not overburdened with entertaining his mom. I don't want him to feel guilty for having his own life. Motherhood, in some ironic twist, reminds me that I must get a life. Now, where shall I start?
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