AA and Christian Community

Frederick Buechner writes in Beyond Words that one can't help wondering if Alcoholics Anonymous embodies "what the church is meant to be and maybe once was before it got to be big business". Buechner asks us to imagine the church as 'Sinners Anonymous', a place where we acknowledge that "I can will what is right but I cannot do it" and "For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I do", as Saint Paul put it. Essentially, Buechner wonders if there is something the church could learn from AA.

I was a guest at a Saturday night AA meeting recently, and was overwhelmed with the truth in Buechner's query. In a spirit of authentic community, we went around the circle sharing thoughts on the evening's theme, gratitude. Each individual introduced him or herself saying "Hi. I'm 'Sadie/Joe'. I'm an alcoholic". And the others responded warmly and immediately with "Hi Sadie/Joe". Each 'Sadie/Joe' then shared his/her thoughts on gratitude.

I was overwhelmed as individuals shared thanks for everything from finally being able to sleep to having hope for starting over. There was thanks for being able to speak truth about the real stuff of life. All in all, I noted a distinct theme as gratitude for each other. One person said "you are my family and I dig it". Another affirmed, "among you I feel home". I heard a deep thanks for the empathy associated with genuine community: One woman said, "I have people to call and to tell my problems; I never thought I could call others...I thought my problems were not big enough. Now I call". A man tearfully expressed thanks for being "totally understood". As the sharing went around the circle, there was absolute attentiveness to not only the words being expressed but also to the sentiment behind them.

One man suggested in the midst of his comments that "every now and then you get an epiphany". And as the circle came to me, I shared mine. " Hi. I'm Cynthia" ...to which I heard a warm reply "Hi Cynthia". I indicated that I was a guest and simply but genuinely affirmed that "I'm grateful to be here." And, I truly was. I am thankful to have witnessed people being loved deeply in the midst of all the crap of life. I am deeply thankful to have witnessed real acceptance, love, and grace; these are, in my estimation, the very qualities within a community that serve, ultimately, to transform individual lives.

I wonder alongside Buechner what it might mean for Christian community if it looked something like, "I am Cynthia. I am a sinner", and the community responded with a "Hi Cynthia" that resonated warmth and welcome. While I have experienced moments of grace in the community of faith, on the whole I often feel that my sinner status must be checked at the church's front door. It requires a leap to imagine the church on the whole as a place where I can say "I am really struggling to do the good that God desires but falling absolutely short" and getting a response that resonated acceptance before judgment, love before advice.

Ultimately, I am thankful to be reminded of the power of community to walk alongside us in our healing and to love us so deeply that we "do the good" that God desires not as a matter of our own will because the gospel reminds us that individual will is insufficient. Rather, we can do the good in the midst of a community that enables us trust more fully in the power of God to transform us only by meeting us exactly where we are.