Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Success-ion!

It's been a long few months. To make a long story short, C and I have been up and down and deciphering and trying to work on the relationship. Hard but good work. As I've been hopeful about rerestoring our relationship status [in a non-Facebook sort of way] I've been really concerned about telling Gabe. Unnecessarily so.

When I told Gabe that I'd decided to date Craig again, Gabe said "Cool", with enthusiasm, and added "If you're happy, I'm happy". I replied with "Thanks Hun", and he continued...."I don't want you to be lonely. When I go off to college, although you'll see me everyday during college[at this point he plans to attend where I work], but after that".

I get it. He's 10. He's good with this because it fits his needs. Still, I think it's also safe to reaffirm that taking care of ourselves is one way of caring for our kids. In this case, Gabe intuits that mommy having someone (in addition to him) in her life will alleviate my loneliness when he leaves the nest. And he is right. At the same time, it alleviates his need to be my caretaker. No kid should feel responsible for his parents' wellbeing. I am committed to not placing that weight of the world on his shoulders. I am glad to have his unbridled support as I take responsibility for my own well-being, and to be reminded that, in doing so, I succeed in my commitment to be responsible for his.